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Sep. 11th, 2005 03:41 pmA TALE OF MY TWO AL TEAMS.
Today, one of my AL teams had an absolute offensive explosion, with a four-run inning and a six-run inning, and fourteen runs altogether, with the opposing team held to just four runs. It was a thing of fucking beauty.
And today, my other AL team got an unearthly, gorgeous, brilliant start, a complete game with one run, three hits, and TWELVE K's. The final score? 1-0. That's right - a start so lovely as to defy our mere human adjectives was thrown away. Oh, and that one run? Yeah, a homerun from a player that everyone on the motherfucking PLANET knows is juicing. (More on that in a moment.)
Yeah? you're saying. So? You should be used to it. That's what the fucking Tigers've have done all season.
BUT WAIT THERE IS A BIZARRO WORLD PLOT TWIST.
The team of asplody goodness was the TIGERS, and the team of limp bats was the RED SOX.
MY BRAIN IT HURTS. THIS IS A WRONGNESS. THE CONFUSION, IT BUUUUUUURRRRRNS.
But, ha, Wake and Nate Robertson should hang out sometime, because Nate has also lost a 1-0 CG to the MFYs. They have so much in common now!
Oh, I am ill. I am so, so happy to see the Tigers get their shit together and have such a game, and I really hope that will prove to be the catalyst they need to go on an upswing. And I am so devastated to see Wake's sparkling performance, and career high in K's, go to waste.
And, look, I gave Jason Giambi the benefit of the doubt for the longest time, okay? Hey, I figured, maybe he really is coming back, this could be legitimate and the most amazing player comeback in the history of ever. But eventually I remembered that I do not in fact live in a world of candy canes and sunshine, and I do live in a world where that does not fucking happen. Sorry, but you don't hit liek wo on steroids, come off them and totally suck, and then magically regain your prowess. Jason Giambi is so obviously on something that it is sickening and an affront to EVERYONE when he comes up to the plate. And I mean everyone. I mean the opposing team, and his own team, and the opposing fans, and perhaps most of all, I mean the Yankees' fans. Way to go, asshole. I hope your fucking BA is worth sacrificing the remaining shreds of your integrity and spitting on anyone who has ever defended you, you walking piece of human waste.
Today, one of my AL teams had an absolute offensive explosion, with a four-run inning and a six-run inning, and fourteen runs altogether, with the opposing team held to just four runs. It was a thing of fucking beauty.
And today, my other AL team got an unearthly, gorgeous, brilliant start, a complete game with one run, three hits, and TWELVE K's. The final score? 1-0. That's right - a start so lovely as to defy our mere human adjectives was thrown away. Oh, and that one run? Yeah, a homerun from a player that everyone on the motherfucking PLANET knows is juicing. (More on that in a moment.)
Yeah? you're saying. So? You should be used to it. That's what the fucking Tigers've have done all season.
BUT WAIT THERE IS A BIZARRO WORLD PLOT TWIST.
The team of asplody goodness was the TIGERS, and the team of limp bats was the RED SOX.
MY BRAIN IT HURTS. THIS IS A WRONGNESS. THE CONFUSION, IT BUUUUUUURRRRRNS.
But, ha, Wake and Nate Robertson should hang out sometime, because Nate has also lost a 1-0 CG to the MFYs. They have so much in common now!
Oh, I am ill. I am so, so happy to see the Tigers get their shit together and have such a game, and I really hope that will prove to be the catalyst they need to go on an upswing. And I am so devastated to see Wake's sparkling performance, and career high in K's, go to waste.
And, look, I gave Jason Giambi the benefit of the doubt for the longest time, okay? Hey, I figured, maybe he really is coming back, this could be legitimate and the most amazing player comeback in the history of ever. But eventually I remembered that I do not in fact live in a world of candy canes and sunshine, and I do live in a world where that does not fucking happen. Sorry, but you don't hit liek wo on steroids, come off them and totally suck, and then magically regain your prowess. Jason Giambi is so obviously on something that it is sickening and an affront to EVERYONE when he comes up to the plate. And I mean everyone. I mean the opposing team, and his own team, and the opposing fans, and perhaps most of all, I mean the Yankees' fans. Way to go, asshole. I hope your fucking BA is worth sacrificing the remaining shreds of your integrity and spitting on anyone who has ever defended you, you walking piece of human waste.
