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so here's the sitch, my circle
Dec. 31st, 2013 08:55 pmI've been drinking, which only means that I have enough courage to tell someone about my situation.
The place I'm living in wants me out. I have a week. I am looking at homelessness.
Why homelessness? Most of my immediate family hasn't got space for another person. The only one who has space is my mother.
Over Christmas, Mom and I had a fight. It wasn't much of a fight, short and small, but it made it clear that she doesn't think my depression is important. Assuming that she would let me live with her? I think I would kill myself within a month. Not because she doesn't love me. She does. But she has had so much fucked up shit to deal with herself this year that I don't think she can handle my shit on top of hers.
So. My depression is bad. But not, in my fucked FUCKED opinion, bad enough. I don't want to die. I don't want to kill myself. It would be easier if I did. Then I could just do it and be over with. That would be nice. But I don't think it's going to happen.
But I still need so much help. I don't even know what I'm asking for. If you want to donate money, I'll give you my PayPal info. If you are a goddamn saint and willing to give me a place to live for an indefinite period while I try to get my shit together - well, you probably don't exist, but if you do, PM me and we can talk.
I'm broke and fucked and scared and I don't want to die but I don't know if I have any other option and help me? Please?
The place I'm living in wants me out. I have a week. I am looking at homelessness.
Why homelessness? Most of my immediate family hasn't got space for another person. The only one who has space is my mother.
Over Christmas, Mom and I had a fight. It wasn't much of a fight, short and small, but it made it clear that she doesn't think my depression is important. Assuming that she would let me live with her? I think I would kill myself within a month. Not because she doesn't love me. She does. But she has had so much fucked up shit to deal with herself this year that I don't think she can handle my shit on top of hers.
So. My depression is bad. But not, in my fucked FUCKED opinion, bad enough. I don't want to die. I don't want to kill myself. It would be easier if I did. Then I could just do it and be over with. That would be nice. But I don't think it's going to happen.
But I still need so much help. I don't even know what I'm asking for. If you want to donate money, I'll give you my PayPal info. If you are a goddamn saint and willing to give me a place to live for an indefinite period while I try to get my shit together - well, you probably don't exist, but if you do, PM me and we can talk.
I'm broke and fucked and scared and I don't want to die but I don't know if I have any other option and help me? Please?