(no subject)

Went to go see Finding Nemo and PotC at the drive-in with Betsey, as planned. (By the way, Geoffrey Rush does a voice in Finding Nemo, which makes our second accidental double-header involving PotC.) First, though, we spent the day in downtown Portland, where I, in spite of the fact that I'm supposed to be saving my money, purchased volume seven of Transmetropolitan (only one more volume and I'll be caught up with the trade paperbacks) and this month's GQ, 'cos with the Johnny Depp interview and all. You know you're a fangirl when you buy an issue of a magazine you don't care about for an article on an actor you're only vaguely interested in. As it turns out, however, GQ is an excellent magazine and had a deal for a cheap subscription, so I'm buying one. (Why are men's magazines so much better than women's? It's not fair.) And the interview was fabulous and a blast to read and I think I feel a new actor obsession coming on.

Then we ended up in used bookstores where I bought - and I love the juxtaposition here - Justine by the Marquis de Sade and three books by Horatio Alger, who wrote the same rags-to-riches novel dozens of times and may be one of the worst popular authors ever to grace our country. He makes Danielle Steele look like a master of poetry and characterization. His stuff's awful slashy though. =D So, yep - an infamous work by the man from whose name the word "sadism" was coined, and books by a man who provided "wholesome entertainment for boys."

Then we eventually ended up at the drive-in. Just as I'm pulling my hand back in through the window after getting our change back, it starts to RAIN. I mean really pissing down. Betsey and I find a space, find the radio station, set the windshield wipers going, and stare at the rain and laugh. Really, what else can you do?

Happily, it stopped about ten minutes into Finding Nemo, so we were able to settle in and concentrate. And seriously? What a cute freaking movie. And the Willemfish is awesome. I love Willem. In his first scene, Gil is supposed to seem all scary and shit, so Willem uses this voice he does, and have I ever mentioned that his voice was half of what inspired my mad lust?

Me: "Uhh . . ."
Betsey, glancing worriedly at me: "You're not going to slash fish now, are you?"
Me: "No. I'm just dealing with being sexually sttracted to one."

Fortunately, that passed. Although I am now trying not to think too hard about the possibilities of Gil/Marlin. *sigh*

And then . . . Pirates!!

Watching PotC at a drive-in is an experience I recommend for several reasons. First, I'd never been to a drive-in before; second, we had the sound on the radio up so loud we could feel it vibrating in the seats; and third, when shut up in a car, you can heckle and snark and slash as loudly as you want. And, if you are so inclined, burst into shrieks of joy at the end. (I think I startled Betsey.)

But, one thing was not cool. Since I'd read all about the bit at the end after the credits, we sat through them, waiting . . . and waiting . . . and waiting . . . fuck, these credits are long . . . they may actually be longer than the ones in Chamber of Secrets . . . here's hoping the end bit is well worth our time . . . oh, we've got down to the special thanks and songs now, we're almost there . . .

And they cut it short.

AAAAAAHHHHH!

But, I took this problem to the kind folks at arrrrr and they explained in detail precisely what we missed.

By the way, Betsey and I have decided that PotC is a sequel to The Road to El Dorado. No, really. Think about it. Cortez's gold, cursed by the "heathen gods" . . . we've decided that it ran thusly: Miguel and Tulio said something offhand about "showing pirates a thing or two" and the freaky psychotic shaman guy took it several steps too far, cursed some gold, hid it, and led Cortez to it at (or after) the end of the movie. So throughout the movie, we're pretending that Miguel and Tulio are present but offscreen, possibly occasionally napping, and sometimes offering commentary: "That's definitely not what we had in mind!" "No. Although I do like the bit about just a few drops of blood. Very sensible, reasonably humane . . ." "Not the point, Miguel." "Right. Sorry."

We got home from the movies at, like, one-thirty, so while we sat around waiting for the movie high (and the caffeine from the iced coffee) to wear off enough so that we could go to sleep, we did the expected activity: created our own movie, complete with ideal cast and general plot.

The title: And Really Bad Eggs. It's about three brothers, played by Willem, Christopher Walken, and Crispin Glover, who are on some unspecified but truly mad and gory mission, as directed by their visions of two gods, played by Kenneth Branagh and Kevin Kline. (Guess where we got that idea.) They are being pursued by three agents of some kind, played by Antonio Banderas, Johnny Depp, and Geoffrey Rush. In the course of their insane mission, the brothers pick up a former pirate captain, played by Ewan McGregor. Ewan has been marooned by his crew, not out of malicious intent or greed, but because he is the worst pirate captain EVER and his crew simply recognized the need for proper leadership. Ewan cannot see the visions that the brothers are having, but he must play along until he can escape, and if they get the slightist hint of the fact that he's not one hundred percent with him, they will kill him. Eventually, it is revealed that the visions are not visions, but hallucinations caused by a drug being put into the rum by their rumrunner, Eliza Dushku. (Well, we needed a woman in there somewhere.) What is the ultimate point of the vision and why has Eliza been deliberately inducing it? We dunno. How were we going to have Antonio and Ewan come together and sing a duet? We dunno. Are the brothers going to succeed or get captured? We dunno. We would really enjoy making this movie, though.

(no subject)

Oh, Raaaaagna, I've a little present for you . . .



( For what it's worth, your Mayor fic. )

(no subject)

alleycatstrike has passed on to me a "Create Your Own League" meme, and, while I have neither seen the movie nor read the comic, I'm going to do it anyway.

The Rules:
1. Choose five to seven characters.
2. They may be from books, movies, comics, TV shows, games, and real life--but no traditional superheroes.
3. They may be from any place in the universe, any time. They do not have to be from the same time/place as the original League.
4. You must identify the recruiter, the villain, and the leader, and there must be at least one female.
5. Optional, you may identify their main mode of transportation.


My League:

Villain: The Marquis de Sade (the Quills version).

Leader: Professor Minerva McGonagall (Harry Potter).

Recruiter: Q (Star Trek: The Next Generation, at least originally).

Members: Agent Paul Smecker (The Boondock Saints), Captain Jack Sparrow (PotC, or haven't you been paying attention?), Spider Jerusalem (Transmetropolitan), and Aziraphale (Good Omens).

Transportation: Jack's ship, the Black Pearl.




Good thing I don't have to give them a mission. They'd never get it done, because they'd all kill each other as soon as Aziraphale got sick of mediating.