remindmeofthe | (no subject)

So I tried going off the Ambien last night; as I expected, I didn't sleep.

There was a difference, though, between this night and the other nights - I wasn't stressing out. I am pretty much at the point where I have accepted that this is how my life is going to be for a while, so I wasn't wound up about it like I have been before. And I still couldn't sleep. Every time I got close to falling asleep, I just resurfaced. It was an actual physical sensation; the whole experience together reminded me of bubbles in a glass of soda. This problem has been cropping up all along, I think, or at least after the first week or two. It happened last weekend at least once; toward morning I got relaxed and drowsy and still couldn't sleep. Benadryl stopped working, if it ever had more than a placebo effect in the first place, because I couldn't get my brain to join in on the sleepiness.

Clearly my problem is no longer a matter of just calming myself down. I'm going back on the Ambien tonight, without too much compunction, because if I need the help, I need the help. I have a follow-up appointment at the student health center with Ann on Monday (Ann being the nurse practitioner I've been seeing; as it looks now as though she's going to be a part of my life for a while yet, I may as well give her a name), so I can talk to her about it then.

My major problem right this second is that it is now nine AM and I have an entire day to get through before I can Ambien up and go back to bed. At least it's a day with Doctor Who in it.

Also: could I use a few more semi-colons in this post?

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If you need the help from meds, you need it: I once heard it compared to a diabetic who needs insulin, nothing to be ashamed of, simply correcting imbalances in your system. I'm sure the nurse will be able to give you some tips to try and trick yourself into sleep, but I've often found it's good to stop trying for a bit if you can't sleep after an hour or so. Sit and read for a bit or something (something not too exciting!), and then try again when you feel so tired you can't see anymore. It's better than lying there getting more and more distressed, at least. :(

**HUGS**

I'm just worried about the Ambien because it's addictive - although, I'm not actually sure I get physically addicted to things. It's weird.

I've used this trick a couple of times. It doesn't seem to help unfortunately, at least not this go-round. Sometimes the physical act of getting out of bed and getting my body going again makes it worse, which is totally unfair.

Thanks so much for all your comments and advice; it has at least been a comfort to know I've got support from people. *hugs*

I totally understand about the Ambien if it's addictive – I have painkillers that are potentially addictive so I constantly find myself trying not to use them until I absolutely have to, because I'm worried about getting hooked.

It sucks that you can't even break up the lying around with something – I can see how you've been getting wound up not sleeping, if all you can do is lie there not sleeping and worrying that you're not sleeping. I keep my iPod under the pillow packed with audiobooks so that I can at least listen to something, and like you say you've not gotten out of bed to do it or made yourself physically active again. Trouble is I keep falling asleep later with it still on! Oops.

That is a good idea - I was trying podcasts before to fall asleep with, which worked like once, but I'm a picky sleeper so a change in tone (getting louder) can be enough to wake me if I'm in the process of dropping off. Using them just to break up the monotony is something to keep in mind, though. It wasn't so bad last night because like I said, I am just beyond stressing about it right now. The only part of the night that was bad was the hour or two after I got up to use the bathroom. :P

Hey, you've only been on Ambien a very short while in the grand scheme of things. You're taking it under advisement of a medical professional (who I am certain sees a lot of cases like yours being at a university health center), and you're taking it in the correct manner.

Right now, you're sick. You're going to get better. It's just taking a little longer than we hoped it might. *hugs you lots and lots*

Well, she did suggest taking it every other night, which I elected not to do because I've about had my fill of attending classes too tired and antsy to pay attention. *sheepish* But I am still within safe bounds according to the info that came with the prescription, and last night's experiment I think proved that every other night wouldn't have worked anyway. We'll see what happens at the appointment on Monday - half the point of this entry was to write stuff down so I wouldn't forget it.

*hugs* Thanks, Viv, you're awesome.

I second all the advice about not worrying about the Ambien being habit-forming at this point. It's too early to have that happen.

And I hear you about that description of resurfacing from sleepiness; that's exactly what happens to me when I can't sleep. (Of course in my case it's not usually chronic.)